Squirrel!
Dogs Like Their Objects Furry, We Like Our Objects Shiny
Repeat after me.
Her emails!
Benghazi!
The Democrats’ pandemic hoax!
Obamagate!
And I know there are a thousand more but my brain is too deadened to remember them. “Obamagate” is the latest poo being thrown against the wall of the monkey habitat. The latest, shiniest distraction cooked up by some twerp somewhere in the bowels of the Kremlin, or Tr*mp Tower, or a Goldman Sachs boardroom. And then spewed forth on the Propaganda News Channel, aka Faux News.
The original fake news outlet, mind you.
The covidiot-in-chief - you know, the guy who couldn’t understand how you could test negative, then positive and wanted to believe the virus would disappear with the heat - spent last Sunday tweeting a shit storm. Something like a tweet every 7 minutes for 12 hours. Perhaps even more often than that.
I don’t know about everyone else but I am in favor of exhuming the Founding Fathers and getting a ruling on whether or not the person who holds the highest office in the land and - at one time - the most powerful position on the planet should even be allowed to use social media. To keep the scatology references going, this turd-in-chief should be de-platformed. He’s a clear and present danger, a menace to society.
The beauty of his logorrhea though is that there is a permanent record that psychologists will be able to study for decades. Assuming there will be people willing to expose their mental health to such nonsensical, all-over-the-map excrement.
Anyhow, one of those tweets read: OBAMAGATE!
He may as well have tweeted: SQUIRREL!
You see, Barack Obama had the temerity to criticize the orange shitgibbon’s coronavirus response and that was all the opening necessary for not “John Barron” to scream at his millions of bots, trolls, Russian handlers, cult members and sycophants one made up word that may as well have been “Squirrel”. As Jeff Tiedrich, one of my favorite Twitter feeders wrote on May 10th, the day in question:
your reminder that Obama's pandemic team gave Tr*mp a playbook on how to deal with an outbreak and the stupid dipshit threw it in the trash and fired the team because he was jealous of a black man's accomplishments
Here is why I think Barack Obama is currently living rent-free in the insufferable boor’s head:
The pandemic continues to be a nightmare made more visceral by the grossly negligent response by this administration. And it is no longer an “existential” threat to the White House because it has breached its walls with, at least, two known COVID positive carriers. I don’t care who you are, at Benedict Donald’s age, you do not want to find yourself intubated in a hospital on a ventilator. So, he may talk a big game and stalk about like a constipated potato, but the virus scares him shitless.
In addition, polls are not looking favorable for anyone associated with the Putin sock puppet, and certainly not looking favorable for him. It is, of course, light years from taking any poll seriously in relation to the fall election but, I’ll bet it pisses him off royally because, in the deranged landscape of what is left of his mind, he just sent $1200 and a personally autographed letter to millions of ungrateful subjects.
Speaking of taxes and federal money, there is one last niggling little thing that may also be the cause of our nitwit-in-chief’s outburst regarding our former constitutional scholar president. . . it’s his own taxes and financial records he has been hiding for quite some time.
Guess what? Holy shit! The Supreme Court is hearing arguments - today - on whether the public should get a glimpse of them.
So, Obamagate, in the immortal words of a bunch of conservative, dipshit talking heads, is a “nothing burger”.
But remember what I wrote yesterday, even if we get the chance to see how deeply mired in Russian mob money this monster is, we are still the ones we’ve been waiting for.
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I apologize for the scatological writing. I just decided on a whim to see if I could insert a feces reference into every paragraph.
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A must-see documentary that, along with the internet, just confirmed my lifelong biases.
Also, here’s a pop song that you’ll have a hard time not singing along with. It’s called Toothbrush by DNCE who also did Cake By the Ocean.
I do like the way you think.